"Hanky Panky"

***

Hawkeye: "I can't decide on who to ask to the movies tonight."
B.J.: [walking out] "I'll bet it isn't me."
Hawkeye: [to his back, ruefully] "Don't be so sure." [to Nurse Donovan] "Well, how 'bout you?"
Donovan: "You're asking me after him?"
Hawkeye: "Well, he turned me down. I'm on the rebound now. This is your big chance."

***

B.J.: "She's helping me with some cases."
Hawkeye: [smiling suggestively] "I could use a little of that kind of help myself."

(Yes, I'm twisting it a bit. But -- but -- it works! - Epigone)

***

Margaret: "I just don't understand why Donald hasn't written."
Hawkeye: "Maybe there's another woman."
Margaret: "Fat chance."
B.J.: "Another man?"

(Speaking from experience, Beej? - Epigone)

***

Margaret: [to Frank] "You're just jealous because Donald is full-lipped."
Hawkeye: "I'm getting excited."
Potter: "Eat your pudding."

(WHOA. And the pudding is so obviously symbolic. - Epigone)

*****

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